Phoebe's Birth Story

Adjusting to life as a family of 4 is going well... tiring, but that is to be expected. Finn is doing a great job of being a patient big brother, and Todd has become super-dad, somehow balancing working full time with managing to spend time with both kids each day. Luckily my mom was in town for over a week doing most of the cooking and cleaning, and a lot of everything else. Not sure what we would have done without her here, and it makes me sad that all of our family lives so far away.
Phoebe's arrival was much anticipated... Finn was born 3 weeks early, and so we were all expecting her to be early as well. A month before her due date my home birth kit was ready and in my mind I was going to have a baby any day. So as the days and weeks passed, and she still hadn't come, I was anxious to meet her and anxious to not be pregnant anymore. She ended up coming 2 days after she was due; I never in a million years would have guessed that she would have been late.... especially since about 5 weeks before her due date I started having a LOT of Braxton Hicks contractions... nights where they would be 5 minutes apart, and I was so afraid that she was going to come way too early. So I went from hoping that she would stay in long enough to wishing that she would just come on out. What a tangled mess of emotions! Looking back, I am so glad that she stayed in so that she could be strong and healthy, but I sure was impatient for her to get here.
Phoebe's birth story really starts on Friday February 25th. My midwife came by for a home visit on Friday afternoon. I asked her to check my cervix just to see if maybe I was dilated at all, and I was 4 cm dilated and 80% effaced. This made me really excited, and I guessed that she would be here by the end of the weekend. That night I started having mild contractions that were 4-5 minutes apart. We gave the midwives a warning and Todd and I were ready to welcome our little girl into the world. By 10 pm, the contractions were still mild and hadn't gotten any closer together so I decided to lay down and get some rest. Soon after, the contractions subsided, I fell asleep, and woke up on Saturday feeling sort of let down. All weekend I had contractions, still mild, about 5 minutes apart. They would start and stop, but never got any stronger or closer. I felt like I was destined to be in early labor for the rest of my life. On Sunday night my back had started to hurt pretty bad and I was getting pretty uncomfortable. I have a back injury that tends to pop up occasionally, but mixed with pregnancy, the pain was pretty unbearable.
Monday morning the contractions were a bit stronger, but not coming regularly anymore. I was doing my best to just not think about it. My mom was scheduled to fly in Wednesday morning, and I hoped she would be born by then, but was honestly starting to doubt it. By Monday afternoon, my back hurt so bad that I couldn't walk and couldn't even get comfortable laying down. I ended up having to put in a movie for Finn and just did my best to rest until Todd got home from work. That night I ended up calling the midwife to see what I could do for pain relief. We were pretty sure Phoebe was pushing into my sacrum, causing my back pain to flare up. She told me to do my best to rest up that night, and we had discussed maybe stripping my membranes the next day to help get labor started. We were hesitant to start labor with a hurt back, yet we were pretty sure that her head pushing into my spine was a big part of that back pain. I even confessed to Todd that if we couldn't get labor started naturally that I may resort to heading to a hospital and getting induced. I was in that much pain.
Tuesday morning I woke up around 7:30 and was having mild contractions about 4 minutes apart. Soon they were only 2 minutes apart. We called the midwife, not knowing if this was it or just another tease. She said she would stop by around 9:30 to check in on me.
By the time she arrived, the contractions were about 5 minutes apart, but stronger than before. She checked my cervix and I was dilated to 7 cm. She decided to stay and unpacked her things.  In the meantime, we got Finn ready and sent him to his friend's house. He was being great with my early contractions, but I knew that once things got more painful, he would probably be upset to see me like that.
I never would have imagined that I would go into labor first thing in the morning, and had expected a night time birth like Finn's. My husband was ecstatic, as he is not very good at staying awake at night. He kept commenting on how perfect this was-- he could drink his coffee while I was laboring away. All I could say was that I was glad the timing worked out for him!
The contractions continued to get stronger, but unlike my labor with Finn, they were not getting consistently closer together. When they were pretty dang intense, I would get 2 right in a row, but then have a 3 minute break. In my mind I wasn't sure if I was almost done, or if things were going to continue on for hours longer.... and that unknown was probably the worst part. But, apparently, that was my transition. Which is awesome...... with Finn, I remember turning into a wild animal during transition, throwing off my clothes and letting my eyes roll back into my head. In all honestly, when I had been thinking about giving birth again, I just really didn't want to go through transition and have that feeling of losing all control over my mind and body. And.. I didn't. During the worst of it I was still all there mentally, and although I was swearing a bit, I was aware that I was doing it and I didn't feel like a werewolf on a full moon. Phew.
The weirdest part was that this whole entire time, the little bean was still flailing around like crazy. I could feel her squirming and kicking during my contractions, which I think maybe helped me stay more grounded into the moment. During Finn's birth he didn't move a bit (or at least I didn't notice), so this was a completely new experience.
The other 2 midwives quietly slipped into the house. I felt the urge to push, I felt my water break and watched it gush onto the bed. With Finn, I had given birth in a tub, and so I never knew when my water broke. The next round of contractions I pushed, and she started to crown, but slipped back in. Since I pushed for almost 3 hours with Finn, I was determined that she was getting pushed out quick. So the next big round of contractions brought her head, and her shoulders came a minute later. Pushing all together only took about 10 minutes.
She was born at 11:41 am. So my labor that day was only about 4 hours, with only 2 of the hours being pretty intense. But, most midwives and doctors say that labor begins once you are dilated to 3 or 4 cm.... in that case, I was in labor for about 5 days!
She came out and immediately pinked up and started crying. My cord was short (I had the same problem with Finn) and so I actually was not able to hold her until the cord stopped beating and was cut. She had very little vernex since she was fully cooked (whereas Finn has come out looking like he was covered in cream cheese) and was perfect. At 7 pounds 4 ounces she was bigger than I had expected (the asthma medication I was on makes babies have lower birth weights) and was healthy! She latched on right away and I fell in love. I didn't need any stitches, didn't hemorrhage (as I did with Finn), and felt pretty good. A birth success!
Having a home birth was great. Not having to pack up to  go anywhere, having everything I needed, being in familiar surroundings and not having to go anywhere afterwords just made the birth that much better. Now I couldn't imagine wanting to do it any other way.
Now I am just enjoying these early days with my wee one. With your first child, there is so much to learn... when Finn was a newborn I felt overwhelmed and unsure of myself.  I often times found myself wishing time away... waiting for the days when he would be done with his colic, when he would sleep through the night, when he would ween himself. This time around I am actually taking the time to enjoy these days, knowing that they are so fleeting. When I am up nursing at 3:30 am, I remind myself that before I know it, her newborn days will be only a memory, so I am trying to take her in through all of my senses and simply live in this moment.

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